You have to understand this. You have to sit on this. You have to lie with this at night. The person you love isn’t a character in a book. Nor are they a person that comes with predetermined qualities. They are continually changing and growing. And most importantly they can only love you like they know how to love. If that means flowers just because or random car drives at 2am to talk. That is what it will be. They will not become the lover you want but will only be what they know. You can compromise and learn each other at best. But at the end of the day you can’t turn a painter into a writer.